Sounds like he wanted you in a vulnerable / dependent position before he sprang this.
I’m poly, what he has done is horrible and I’ve seen so many monogamous people be pressured and broken down by assholes like him. Please don’t let him do that to you. Your marriage is unlikely to recover – he manipulated this situation to get your blessing to have an affair. Going from monogamous to poly doesn’t work when someone specific is in mind, he’s just using poly as a way of legitimising an affair.
If I was in your shoes I’d be getting my ducks in a row to leave, it’ll be painful and may be difficult at first but it’s better to do it now than after his affairs come out and you’re hurting even more.
Don’t try and be OK with something you’re not, poly won’t work if you’re not both enthusiastic and wired that way, and clearly you’re not and that’s perfectly fine. There is absolutely nothing wrong with how you are, don’t be pressured into trying to change.
So weird how people suddenly realise they’re “polyamorous” at the age of 29, lmao.
He isn’t poly, just wants to fuck other women.
>A few weeks after I’ve resigned and there’s no going back my husband tells me that he is Polyamorous and wants to know if I would be okay with having another partner in our relationship, a girlfriend for both of us in a sense, and if I would be okay with that potential girlfriend being a friend of mine…
sounds like he just wants to have sex with your friend