Relazioni e amore

I (35 F) discovered my husband’s (38 M) infidelity and his double life thanks to a post on Facebook

schoettli ci racconta la sua esperienza amorosa:

My husband and I have been married for 10 years and have two children together.

He travels often. I also want to say that about 8 months ago I discovered that I was infected with an incurable STD; He blamed me for this, saying that I was the unfaithful one.

Well, I was browsing Facebook in a Mothers group, in that group it is for help with children, to ask for donations, share experiences and memes.

A mother shared that she would give her husband a laxative tea so he wouldn't go to a soccer game the next day. It was all mockery and laughter in the comments of the post and telling her to update the result.

I am a person who likes to read comments, unfortunately I saw a profile that had a photo of a woman with my husband.

I started watching and apparently they got married civilly, my husband created another profile but has a different name and surname. I think that child has his false last name because she uploaded a post when she went to register the child's birth certificate and placed the full name there as if she were proud of it.

I posted it in the same group (now that they give the option to post anonymously), several gave me advice and we deduced that possibly the other lady didn't know because of what she shared on her profile.

I wrote to her and was surprised that the b*tch did know that he was married. They have been married for 2 years and their baby is approximately 14 months old. Although they are not technically married, their marriage is not valid.

I hired a lawyer, I took all the evidence and I am in the divorce process, since when I complained he preferred her, he left the house to live with her. Besides, he refuses to give alimony, claiming that he has another child to support, and that if he has to give alimony to my children, he will seek the minimum payment even if he has to quit his job.

How do I proceed with my life? I think I feel very limited in rebuilding my life because of the STD and my children.

Sorry for my English, I'm not American.

Leave the alimony and child support up to the lawyers and the judge. Just tell your lawyer what he said about quitting his job to avoid child support.

I hope your lawyer gets husband on bigamy.

Your husband can shoot his mouth off all he likes. Doesn’t mean what he says has any grounding in reality.

Bigamy is a crime in most of the world. He’s also been living under an assumed name, which I’m betting is on his youngest’s birth certificates. That’s a whole lotta legal mess right there, and this will only bolster your case in court.

In many jurisdictions, child support and alimony are separate. He will owe child support unless the final custody agreement is 50/50, or he is awarded more custody time than you. And even then, many jurisdictions will forgo child support only if both parties agree and/or both parties have similar incomes.

Alimony typically is for supporting a former spouse if one ex partner was paying for a majority of the household expenses/lifestyle. So, if you were a SAHM, in most jurisdictions you’d qualify for alimony.

His youngest child will not necessarily be factored into the divorce settlement, child support, or alimony. Just because he chose to have two families doesn’t negate his obligations to you and your children. And the youngest child and second wife are not parties to your divorce.

Get a lawyer, stand firm, and take him to the cleaners.

Let the lawyers handle everything OP. This guy is a scumbag. Don’t be scared about having an STD and dating! If you look online there is even specific websites for dating for people with STD’s. It’s very common and nothing you should be ashamed of. There’s a whole community of people out there that share your same struggle.

Did you talk to your lawyer about going after him for giving you an STD? He’s a low life.

Take him for all he’s worth and let him quit his job.
Also, is the STD popular enough that there are dating groups that you can join where the people already have it? Also will medicine help keep it contained (I’m unsure the phrasing) ?

You can sue him for deception of identity. You can tell the judge he has been living two separate lives and you can sue him for his property as well. As he had not only lied about his identity but he had other assets outside of the marriage. Thus he would have to pay you back because he spent money outside of the marriage!!

You can also press charges as he had giving you an STD as a result of the affair!


I would take him to the cleaners, I would tell his family and his friends. Never protect a cheater, they often tell people you cheated to protect themselves, you gave him STI. I knew when he accused you, it was his issue…Who does that to someone they love no one…Then get up and take your life back. Work make more money (even if it takes awhile) Get some talk therapy to get over this. Then marry tall dark and handsome and faithful…YOu know this is going to blow up….

That is marriage fraud, it’s an offense in a lot of countries. Keepbto what your lawyer tells you, they should know what do do in your situation best.