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How do you like your coffee?

With A cake, On that note HAPPY CAKE DAY!!

Half coffee, half cream.

Splash of half and half

Barely ever. But when I do, definitely sugar and probably a flavored cream. Basically a true coffee lovers worst nightmare

The same way I like any and all ostensibly relevant women and/or minorities: as a horribly offensive yet inescapably hilarious punchline first thing in the morning.

It just makes the rest of your day go that much better.