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How do you stop your kids from hitting you in the nuts 1000 times a day?

Bentornati ad un’altra stupefacente edizione delle domande di cultura generale!

Questa volta abbiamo cercato una domanda rivolta ai ragazzi.

I think I’m going to save a ton of money on a vasectomy at this rate. I have two year old twin girls and they’ve grown to optimal potato mashing height.

Thankfully they don’t do it on purpose (yet) but I feel like I’ve spent the past month in near constant pain and the only I’ve been able to speak is that guttural gasp that comes as every bit of your soul is forced out of every orifice and your vision turns to static.

Every single action seems tailor made to inflict as much damage as possible. Every interaction an opportunity to bring daddy to their level.

“Daddy pick me up!” But first I’m going to use your man purse as a speed bag to get your attention.

“Give daddy a hug!” But first make sure you head butt him like you’re trying to score the championship goal from across the pitch.

“Climb up on the couch with daddy.” His giblets can be used as an emergency hand hold for greater leverage.

I love my children but if I met a genie I’d ask for a time machine, a box of Trojans, and an ice pack.

Does anyone have any strategies for dealing with this?

Ed ecco le risposte:

I’ve been a father for over a decade and I’ve got several children…I cannot recall one time where any of them knocked me in the nuggets.

You have to explain to them in 2 year old talk that they hurt you and to be careful. Obviously, this is not the time to be overly specific on what they are hurting. Kids understand a lot and you will be surprised how careful they can become.

Drop them off at the local fire station. 15 years later it’s still the best decision I ever made

I’d get a cup.

Hit them in the nuts back