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People who don’t have to poop after drinking coffee, what other magical abilities do you have?

I can turn red traffic lights green just by staring at them.

Working from home, I’ve managed to get out of the habit of drinking 3-4 pints of coffee a day. I guess I’m better off now that you mention it.

It never makes me poop it just makes me pee every 20 mins for two hours

I can drink an entire pot and then lay down and take a nap

I’d love to know the answer to this one. When I drink coffee, my insides be, like, “That’s it, he drank it… expel everything. That’s right, send it all out!”