Relazioni e amore

Dealing with work rumors about my boyfriend(30m) and I feel like I(27f) am going down in spiral because of it.

tamiaredguard ci racconta la sua esperienza:

I'm on my phone so forgive me for formatting and spelling. I hope this gets attention.

Background story: Me and my boyfriend has been going through a rough patch in our relationship since March and it has been hard between us. And as it is now, we are taking space from one other to think about ourselves and our relationship. I mention to him that this space is not a break or a pass to fuck anyone and he said I should give him more credit but how can I when I'm hearing all of these questionable rumors. This saturday is when we will talk about it.

So anyways, my boyfriend works at a mental facility with 3 of my friends there and I been telling them not to get involved but they tell me very concerning things about my boyfriend and another girl named Jazz. And they also told me that he has been telling everyone at the work place that he is 26 which is really strange because since he is 30 years old. Jazz is a new worker at the work place and she has a record of being questionable around men and me hearing things about her is concerning. One rumor is about when my boyfriend came into work with a hickey on monday and saying he was out with her and coworkers on the weekend and 3 people confirmed it that he does. And another rumor is about he asked her out on a lunch and they been eating together in his car during lunch break. My friend also told me that she heard that Jazz would curse at him and he would be super whipped and answer to her. Right now, I really boiled about it and I was going to message the girl but then whats my end game? I know my friends do look out for me but I'm not sure what to do about these rumors.

tl;dr: Hearing work rumors about my boyfriend during we are having space from another and I don't know what to do about them.

Don’t message the girl. She’s not your business. Your issue is with your…ex? boyfriend? what is he?

If you are on a break, it’s probably a breakup. Regardless, it seems like he’s cheating, and your problem is with him. Do you want to be with a cheater, or not? If not, break up with him. If you do, enjoy being cheated on and please get tested for STIs regularly.

>One rumor is about when my boyfriend came into work with a hickey on monday and saying he was out with her and coworkers on the weekend

Well…. did he have a hickey and did you give it to him? If he did, and you didn’t…..

Forget BS breaks. You’re together or you’re not. It sounds like “not” is the better choice (especially looking at your post history). If you need a months-long break to think about if this relationship should continue, it shouldn’t. If there are problems, a break doesn’t fix those problems, just gives you a brief respite from them (and you’re not even getting that respite – you’re still stressing about what he’s doing and if he’s fucking other women or lying). Just end it and cut contact with him, and if your gossipy friends won’t stop telling you about him after you ask him not to, start making new friends. And FFS, don’t contact Jazz. Your relationship boundaries are for you and your soon-to-be-ex to enforce. If you have to call up the alleged other woman to chase her off your man or even just to find out what he’s been doing with her, it means you don’t trust your BF to such a degree that you shouldn’t be in a relationship with him.

dont talk to Jazz.
this is between you and your man, that is who you need to have deep conversation with. i would gather all the information you have write it down and ask him questions…
i would def follow your gut, if something isnt adding then you have to decide what you want to do.
make sure that if you decide to proceed with the relationship then maybe you can set your boundaries

Do you trust your boyfriend?