I (F28) told my ex husband’s(M28) new baby mama his custody tricks. I’m hoping I made the right decision.
My ex husband recently got into getting women pregnant and dumping them. He started with me, but we were married. Within a few months of our divorce being finalized, he got a new girl pregnant and immediately dumped her. I didn’t like that because the girl is younger than us, and it felt like a really dirty trick. They’ve been together 4 months. Sure it was her fault too, but it seemed extra yucky because he’s a good 6 years older than her. She’s in her early 20s.
**He refuses to pay child support, which I work around bc I make decent money. We have 50/50 custody due to the automatic law in Arkansas for married couples with children. He will not split bills or anything else with me. The new girl is a waitress who just moved in with her mom to make ends meet. I criticized him for dumping her because he said she just “wasn’t the one.” His immaturity about the situation annoyed me. I asked if he was going to pay her child support, and he said he can be a good father without paying child support. It made me angry so I typed up all the tips I could give her that I learned the hard way. I sent them to her and told her she could use the info or ignore it but that I felt she deserved to know.
The tips were like: “judges won’t take a breastfeeding baby from its mother so don’t use formula at the hospital so you have records of breastfeeding” and stuff like that.
I totally acknowledge that this is none of my business, but I went through it and I feel for her. He is manipulative and financially abusive. Should I have just let it alone?
He told me never to talk to her again but our kids are siblings. She also did not have any complaints about me talking to her. She didn’t even tell him what I said, but he’s jumping all over me about it. I don’t want to see that baby or the mother hurt the way we had to. We (my baby and I) struggled for a long time to get by.
**i realize that I misspoke when I said child support. I meant he doesn’t pay his half of the medical bills, clothes, and other costs for our child.
Good for you! Your children will be siblings, that means a lot.
You should both be legally putting him on the hook for child support. Why aren’t either of you holding him accountable? If you don’t need the money save it for the kids college fund. The kids are entitled to it and you do them a disservice by letting him off the hook.
Scary behaviour from him. Glad you tried to help the girl out. Having someone’s kid is a huge deal.
If you guys can talk civilly and keep him out of it.. as in both of you don’t mention to it to him what you guys even talk about.. I don’t see the issue. He can’t control if you guys are friends but I would definitely not bring up what you guys talk about, or that will stir the pot everytime.
This man is doing it on purpose. Keep talking to her! He doesn’t want you to talk to her because he doesn’t want you all helping each other.
Keep records of everything.
Good for you. Can’t let this WishDotCom Nick Cannon get away with this crappy behavior.
>He refuses to pay child support, which I work around bc I make decent money
What do you mean he refuses? Have you taken him to court over it? If not, why not?
You’re a good woman. Your ex is an animal.