Would you treat your friend like this? Would you stomp all over the boundaries and feelings of someone you loved and respected? No. God, I hope not.
Get out. He doesn’t respect how you feel, this isn’t salvageable. If someone I cared about told me they were uncomfortable/trigged with me doing something, even if it was innocuous to me (which calling someone with an ED history fat is NOT), I’d do my best to make their life easier and less stressful by accommodating. Like that’s a basic courtesy I’d give ANYONE. the idea that he’s not willing to do so for a romantic partner…. he’s a child. He’s an asshole. He’s got the emotional maturity of a toddler. Run, you’re better off.
He is not toughening you up. He is just highlighting the stuff you’re insecure about, which is a douchey thing to do. I don’t know, if you’re too sensitive in general, but the examples you mentioned are pretty reasonable to feel hurt.
I would be very surprised, if his mother or father made some open remarks regarding your weight. It’s just an excuse he gives you instead of owning up to the bullshit he gives you.
Getting angry over hanging up on customer service which you always can call again is just ridiculous. Instead of saying that it was a douchebag move to get angry over something so trivial like a phone call w/ customer service he tries to blame you and asks, if you’re going to be like “that” — even though he should know that he’s the douche.
You should stand your ground. If he doesn’t accept it, what’s the worst that can happen? You go your separate ways which you should anyway, if he doesn’t learn to respect you.
I felt that people were too sensitive around me as well until I learned that it’s not for me to decide when others are allowed to feel hurt. And I figured that I’m quite sensitive and get defensive quickly, too.
P.S. He may actually think that people around him are too sensitive. You need to set boundaries and make him understand that his perception may differ from others. If he doesn’t, what can you do?
You are NOT being sensitive. This is verbal/mental abuse. That’s never okay.